FashBlog.com

By Brandi M. Seals

I think I need to just stop going to stores. Each time I go, I see something new and hideous. I really thought I would need to be older than 24 to feel such a disconnect from what is popular. I thought that happened around age 35 or older. I guess I was wrong. It crept up on me slowly. First music went to hell in a hand basket. Who really want to hear lyrics like "my humps, my humps, my lovely lady lumps"? I know I do not. It is not that they offend me; the lyrics are just too stupid.

Now I am noticing a disconnect with the fashion industry. Trust me; I will not be busting out any high waisted mom jeans and a hugely over-sized sweatshirt to wear the rest of my life. Nor will I become frozen in time, like those that wear clothes from another generation. It is like time stood still and all they own are big shoulder pad jackets from the 80s. I refuse to do that. But, am I the only one that sees how hideous some things are?

I cannot bear to venture into the junior's department. It is not that I shop in that section because clearly I am too old for it, plus I do not think my hips could squeeze into any of those thin-legged pants they keep over there. The reason I will not even walk through the area is that there is always some hideous outfit on display. About a month ago I was looking at some purses that were near the junior's department. I looked up only to be horrified by the sight of furry legwarmers. That is right ladies and gentlemen, apparently teens are suppose to look like sasquatch. I just do not get it. How is that stylish? Who decided this would be a good look?

The same goes for all those morons who ran out and bought gauchos. Is it cool to look like your pants are too short and really wide? They do not look good. They are like capris on steroids, only they are supposed to be a tad dressier.

Sometimes I like living in Arkansas. While some people would say that people here are slow, sometimes that is a good thing. They are slow on picking up bad trends. I have only seen about 5 women sporting gauchos here. The rest are hanging on racks in every department store with a clearance tag that reads about $10. Back home in Michigan, people actually bought the gauchos. Do not get me wrong, Arkansas people are not immune to bad trends, after all a shocking number of them own those horrible croc shoes. Talk about tacky. Anyway, what I am saying is people tend to be a little more conservative here and when something really questionable comes into style; they do not tend to run out and buy it quickly. It seems they sit back and wait to see if it catches on.

My latest find that I cannot believe made its way into stores is a dog purse. Let me clarify, that is a purse that looks like a dog. They have legs, a tail, and a head. They also have room to put your wallet and keys away. How did this get into a store? I could understand finding them in a dollar store, but come on people. Do you really expect someone to carry this thing around? Maybe it will catch on with the preteens, but for the most part I think the doggy purse will not even make a dent into the fashion industry. Especially since it took me awhile to determine which end the head was on when it came to a furry mini yorkie purse. I did not stick around long enough to see all the different kinds of pooch purses, but there is definitely a mini yorkie and a pug style out there.

I wonder what the next crappy trend will be. I foresaw those high waisted skirts and pants coming. Oh, I know what it will be. Since so much attention has been paid to bangs lately, I am going to guess that big bangs will try to make a come back within the next year.