FashBlog.com

OK, so by now most of us are probably aware of the fact that the skinny jeans are back. Also referred to as drainpipe jeans, the designers aren't going so far as to call these tapered, but those of us who are dreading a return to the 1980s see them as just that. You can't fool us: we're on eighties watch.

We've all seen the commercials of the super-skinny models who can rock these jeans with heels and make them look fantastic. Let's face it: this is not a trend for at least 60% of us to wear. Maybe when we were ten and they were called, um, tapered pants and we didn't even care how much larger our hips looked than our ankles; but not now. Seriously, don't the fashion gurus on What Not to Wear preach against this? Don't they call it the ice cream cone effect? Don't they push every single woman to buy wide or straight-legged pants... and for good reason, because they all look ten times better in them?

But enough about the skinny jeans, really. Because that isn't what I'm here to talk about. What I AM here to talk about is a whole different animal... the skinny black pant. Specifically, the skinny black pants that have made their return in a recent commercial featuring Audrey Hepburn.

Much like the old commercials of Fred Astaire dancing with a vacuum cleaner, these new skinny black pants commercials show Audrey Hepburn, in clips from the movie Funny Face, dancing away... except this time she's doing it to the tune of AC/DC. And we're focused (or supposed to be focused) on her skinny black pants.

While I think the commercial is a little cheesy (I am one of those women who believes Audrey Hepburn should forever be seen as a model of ladydom and this commercial makes her look a little ridiculous in my opinion), I have to admit it- I AM excited about the return of these pants.

Not even for myself, because I think that although black pants (no doubt with a little stretch Lycra built in) are far more forgiving than skinny jeans, I still think it's going to take a certain body type to wear them. And that body type probably isn't mine.

But what I love is the fact that instead of being a hideous 1980s throwback like skinny jeans, skinny black pants are just so... sixties. They make me think of Laura Petrie rocking them in her living room (to the dismay of the censors) when Dick Van Dyke comes home from work. They make me think of little button-down shirts tied at the waist and perky flats and girls with cute bubble hairdos. This is good vintage, people. I think going back to tapered jeans is a little like making jokes about the assassination of President Kennedy: it's just too soon, it's still painful.

The return of the skinny black pants, though, this is good vintage. Just like bell bottoms were a welcome sight when they came back for awhile in the early 2000s. Maybe the rule is that we only like the trends we weren't alive to see the first time around- I'm not sure. Regardless, I don't think there's anyone who wouldn't welcome the return of these types of unique sixties trends. There is something liberating and charming and a little kitschy about them, like a sugar-coated version of a decade I didn't experience.

And now that I think about it, maybe the skinny black pants are more accessible to the average woman than I thought. For one thing, they can be layered with tunic tops or other things that will help camoflauge the problem areas and still create the cute kicky look. For another, they could even be worn beneath a dress with a few strands of long necklaces and some beaded flats for a really unique fashion statement.

So, yeah. I'm not sure if I'll buy any. But I'm happy that the skinny black pants are back. And as long as they don't start cutting them to above the knees, turning them into biker shorts, and adding black lace to the cuffs a la 1988, I'll continue to think that this particular retro trend is a good thing.
-by bjp