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When I was in my early 20's I was a size 6. After about eight years, a slower metabolism and a more sedentary life of working five days a week behind a desk typing away I gained about 15 pounds. I still work out, I still eat well, but I just can't seem to get back to what I used to weigh. So how come at most stores I still wear a size 6, sometimes even squeezing into a size 4. The answer? Vanity sizing. A fairly new concept that has been evolving over the last few years.

What is it?

It is a concept of marketing genius, that feeds into our thin culture, where we are led to believe that if we fit into a size 4 or 6 we will be happier. And sadly it works. I don't want to admit it, but who does not feel better when they can still wear the same sizes of their youth. Retailers have found the holy grail to brand loyalty. If they give their customers the impression they are smaller and able to buy small clothes, even thought the clothes are really bigger, then the customer will come back for more. Sounds simple enough.

As consumers we know what is going on. I've known it for a while. All of our sizes are getting bigger, because we as Americans are getting bigger. The problem I have with vanity sizing though is not so much that I feel better getting into a small size, it is the fact that the fashion industry knows that us normal women are insecure and intrigued by Hollywood's slim perfect ideals that we will buy their clothes even though deep down we know it is a lie.

Inherently this displays our lack of self acceptance and shows just how tied to skinny our culture really is. If it was okay to be a size 10 by society's standards, or even a 12 or 14, do you think that we would still need vanity sizing. I think not. If we as women could only learn to accept ourselves as we are in a healthy way, instead of trying to kill ourselves to be what is conveyed by the media as perfect, we would need this form of manipulation.

Sure, America has an obesity problem, but instead of changing sizes to give us the illusion we are smaller when in fact we are not, why not focus on the real solutions? Pick up a magazine and you will see emaciated images of Kate Moss, Nicole Ritchie, and Kate Bosworth going to unrealistic limits to lose weight. If we drop the unrealistic expectations, stop going on the proverbial starve fest, and start just listening to what our bodies need as far as food goes, I think we would be able to reduce a lot of the unhealthy thought processes that lead to emotional eating and overeating. As long as we are healthy, take care of our bodies, exercise, and eat right we are okay at a size 10 or 14 or 16.

Chico's, an upscale fashion retailer has a good concept. Their idea is to focus on comfort rather than size. "We want you to look great but most of all, feel great!" is what their website states. Their sizes run from 0-3 based on measurements and traditional sizing techniques. A 0 runs approximately a size 4/6, a 1 runs 8/10, a 2 runs 12/14 and a 3 runs 16/18. I felt a relief when I was shopping there recently, not having to agonize over whether or not I was going to be an 4, 6, or an 8 that day. It was freeing to just look for clothes and not have to stress about if I was going to be on the rollercoaster ride of vanity sizing. I went for the clothes that I liked that had flare, that were me and I could care less about the size because it did not mean much. The vanity sizing numbers game was diffused and I was able to shop happily ever after.

As strong women we need to stand up and speak out and be accepting of ourselves. We are mothers, professionals, wives, daughters, and we are okay without being rail thin. We are beautiful as we are. If we stopped rejecting the fundamental truth that we are inherently beautiful and just plain okay as we are then we could fight the media stereotypes and this new issue of vanity sizing.